


cloud nine

by sign_from_god_complex



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders is a Sweetheart, Cross-Posted on Tumblr, Cuddling & Snuggling, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Napping, and he does this by forcing them to take naps with him, he just wants to emotionally support his boyfriends, seriously that's pretty much all this fic is about
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-14
Updated: 2020-06-14
Packaged: 2021-03-03 19:07:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,823
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24710536
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sign_from_god_complex/pseuds/sign_from_god_complex
Summary: It was the closeness Virgil liked about it—a kind of passive affection that soothed over the cracks in your soul if just for a moment, long enough for you to relax and breathe. Maybe it didn’t solve everything, maybe it didn’t solveanything, but Virgil thought it was a good place to start.
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil/Creativity | Roman/Logic | Logan/Morality | Patton
Comments: 8
Kudos: 166





	cloud nine

**Author's Note:**

> Logan is the little spoon and yes, I will die on that hill. Also the irony of the premise of this fic being naps and cuddling—two things I do not enjoy—is not lost on me.
> 
> **Warnings:** Description of a panic attack, anxious thoughts spiral (and in that, a very brief mention of drugging and kidnapping), vague descriptions of a battle, a character overworking themself and food mention.

“Nap with me?”

Virgil watched Patton’s head snap up from where he’d been glaring down at the kitchen counter, the remnants of his baking now mostly cleared away and cupcakes cooling by the oven. Virgil wasn’t even sure he’d realised he’d been doing it—some sort of absent-minded projection of his emotions onto the cold marble, as if _it_ were to blame for all that he was feeling—but the glare was gone now. 

“What was that, honey?” Patton asked, his grin big and completely fake. Virgil could see the lines of exhaustion in every inch of his body—the physical manifestation of weeks of overworking and denial.

Virgil wandered further into the kitchen from the doorway he’d been standing in, tucking himself into Patton’s chest. It barely took a moment for Patton to wrap his arms around his boyfriend, soft and close and safe, and Virgil could feel the warm glow in his chest increase. He hoped Patton’s was doing the same—anything to replace the sadness he knew resided there.

Virgil pressed a kiss to whatever part of his boyfriend he could reach, already feeling almost drunk off of the contact. “Nap with me.”

It was Virgil’s way of saying, “I want to be near you,” and they both knew that, except this time maybe it was for Patton more than himself. Virgil despised seeing any of his partners upset—there was almost nothing worse—and he couldn’t do much to try and cheer them up, but he could do this.

There was a moment where Virgil worried Patton was going to protest, claim that he was fine or that he wasn’t very tired—both things Virgil knew to be a lie. Patton just sighed though, heavy and low, and Virgil knew from that that the fake grin was gone—probably had been since the moment he curled up in his arms.

“Yeah, alright, sweetie. I can do that.”

Virgil pulled back enough to grab Patton’s wrists, barely leaving a moment without some sort of contact, and dragged him over to the couch. Patton followed him patiently with his mask half-cracked, bits of weariness and fatigue shining in through his soft expression.

Throwing himself down, Virgil pulled Patton on top of him and after a moment of trying to get situated he was able to exhale. He could feel Patton’s warmth all around him, the soft, chaste kisses he placed against his skin and the exhale of his breath as he relaxed for the first time that afternoon.

“I love you,” Patton mumbled, nuzzling the back of Virgil’s neck. The gesture was gentle and kind of silly and Virgil smiled softly, melting even further into Patton’s embrace.

“I love you too.”

Patton hummed in contentment, lazy and full of adoration, and it was barely any time at all before the two of them had fallen asleep.

* * *

“Nap with me?”

It was the first thing Virgil had said upon Logan answering the door and although he wished that maybe he had built up to it, he couldn’t feel particularly remorseful. It was what he had come here to ask.

Logan blinked at him for a moment, seeming mildly caught out, before finally pulling open the door further and granting Virgil entry to the room.

Logan’s bedroom was a mess. There were markers scattered all over the desk as well as shoved into the rubbish bin, scrunched up bits of paper littered all around the floor and a giant poster board shoved onto the bed, half filled up with numbers and graphs Virgil didn’t understand the significance of. He could physically feel the stress in the room, filling up the air and pressing down on the two of them as they stood there.

Virgil watched his boyfriend sigh, running his hand through his hair before speaking. “Virgil, I’m very sorry, but I cannot. I simply have too much work to do. Why not go t-”

“No one’s seen you in days, L." 

Virgil’s interruption was met by a look of shock and guilt—something that only flitted across Logan’s face for a moment before he composed himself. Virgil could see the tension in his shoulders though, the restlessness of his hands wanting for something, _anything_ , to do. So, he wasn’t fooled.

” _Please_ , nap with me?“ Virgil let his voice break slightly, let some of the worry shine through in his words and watched Logan’s expression soften.

He stepped forward, wrapping his arms around Logan’s waist but keeping his face in sight—noting his dry, bitten lips, the bags under deep, brown eyes and the way that they shone with unshed tears. He didn’t say anything. Instead, he cupped his boyfriend’s cheek in his hand, pressing their foreheads together.

"I- yes. Okay,” Logan whispered, words exhaled into the small space between them and Virgil closed that gap, if only for a moment.

The kiss was soft—so delicate and light that you could almost question whether it had happened at all—but the love it exuded was more than enough compensation. There were definitely tears now, Logan’s shoulders drooping and his cheeks wet and Virgil moved to wipe them away, touch as light and delicate as the kiss itself.

“My room?”

Logan nodded, expression almost dazed—drifting somewhere in a space beyond deadlines and scripts, filled instead with the softness of Virgil’s touch and the warmth of his body.

Virgil’s almost certain Logan didn’t register the movement to his room until they’d already arrived, Logan curled up against his chest and Virgil’s hand running through his hair as he let his boyfriend cry. He muttered quiet reassurances, love confessions spoken in words you might not expect and barely registered the slow, steady breathing of his boyfriend as he too fell asleep.

* * *

“Nap with me?”

“Virgil, what in the world are you doing?!” Roman yelled, shoving him out of the way just in time for the arrow that was speeding past to spear into the tree behind them. Virgil took a moment to enjoy the warmth of Roman’s hands against him but a moment was all he was afforded as Roman pulled back to resume the battle.

Virgil ran up towards him, ignoring the way the clashing of swords edged into his brain and made him wince. Everything was so loud—the yelling and fighting permeating every inch of the forest clearing—and Virgil’s head was throbbing, but he had a mission here and he couldn’t let his panic get in the way.

“Roman, stop the scene!”

Roman threw Virgil a glance over his shoulder, sparing only a moment to try and figure out his motives before bringing his attention frontwards again. “What are you talking about?! It doesn’t work like that!”

“Yes, it does, I know it does!” His words were tight now, tense and desperate.

He shut his eyes in an attempt to gain some sort of balance in his surroundings but it only seemed to make everything louder—the distant sounds now touching up against his skin, prickling and hot and impossible to ignore. He fell to the ground but it barely even registered, sounds piercing his gut and every inch of his body tense and shaky.

“ **ROMAN, STOP!** ”

His voice echoed throughout the clearing and in an instant, everyone was gone.

Virgil wasn’t even sure if it was him or Roman who had done it but it didn’t feel like it mattered now as Roman knelt beside him, hands tightly holding his own and whispering apologies into the now quiet clearing. Virgil wanted to reassure him that he didn’t need to apologise, he just needed to listen, but all he could get out were gasps as he tried to bring himself back to a state of calm.

After a moment Virgil could feel tapping against his skin—one, two, three, four, _pause_ ; one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, _pause_ ; one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, _pause_ —and he held his breath, trying to follow along despite his body screaming for more air. He could hear Roman letting out bits of praise amidst Virgil’s heaving breaths, reassuring him how well he was doing and how perfect he was and how much he loved him and Virgil gripped his hands tighter, trying not to cry.

By the time Virgil could breathe again his entire body was sore, his muscles weak and his head still pulsating with every movement. He released the grip he had on Roman’s hands, letting them fall away and wincing slightly as he drew back entirely, sapping away the warmth Virgil had been soaking up.

“I’m sorry, darling, I should have listened to you.” His head was hung, shame and self-directed anger radiating from his posture. Virgil maybe would have smacked him if he’d had any energy left in his body. 

“It’s not your fault, princey.”

Roman’s head snapped up as he began to protest, “But, I-”

“It’s not.” Virgil sighed, pushing Roman back until he was laying on the grass beneath them. “I’m the one who decided to come into your realm in the first place; I knew this might happen.”

He curled up beside him, head resting on Roman’s chest as it rose and fell with his breaths, slowly matching the rhythm with his own as a hand found its way into his hair. It wasn’t the most comfortable place to take a nap but Virgil could already feel himself getting drowsy, the panic attack having drained away all of his regular nervous energy and leaving him with nothing but drooping eyelids and heavy limbs.

“You don’t have to come out here and fight a dragon witch or whatever to be important, you know?” Virgil murmured, words slurred and filled with much more meaning than expected, “You’re important to us. You help us every day just by being around, you don’t need to do anything more than that.”

Virgil could feel the way Roman froze underneath him, taking a slow, deliberate breath and letting it out almost silently. “I’ll try to remember that.”

There was clear affection in his words, gratitude and a sense of peace he hadn’t had moments before. Virgil let himself smile. 

“Good,” he hummed, snuggling in even closer to his boyfriend before shutting his eyes and letting sleep overtake him.

* * *

“Look, all I’m saying is that this is a terrible idea.”

Virgil spun around on his heel, pacing back the other way towards the kitchen, before spinning around again. 

He could hear Logan sigh and Virgil ignored the uncomfortable feeling that shot through his chest at the prospect of having annoyed his boyfriends. He knew they’d get sick of his constant worrying someday, but that didn’t mean he was at all prepared for it to happen.

“It’s far too late to back out now, Virgil,” Logan commented, flipping through Thomas’ vacation itinerary for the third time that evening, “and I can promise you, everything is going to be perfectly fine.”

“You _can’t_ promise me that, though. You don’t know what could happen; you can’t see the future! What if Thomas gets drugged? Or kidnapped?!” Virgil’s eyes were wide as he spun to face his boyfriends. “Does anyone remember what to do if you get locked in the boot of a car?!”

Patton laughed nervously as Virgil went back to his pacing, fidgeting with the edges of his cat hoodie and offering his boyfriend a smile—wobbly, unsure, he wants to break up, they all hate you. “Now, kiddo, I’m sure none of those things will happen, it’s just a trip!”

“But you _can’t_ be sure!” Virgil yelled, throwing his hands up to tug at his hair.

He wished his thoughts would shut up for once in his life but, of course, he could never be granted such mercy. He was Anxiety—a plague, a terror, a _dark side_ —and that was all he was ever going to be. He was never going to get any better and they were going to realise and hate him just as much as they had before and he was going to be all alone the way he deserved to be. They were too good for him, he should just break up with them right now so they didn’t have to-

“Come nap with us.”

Virgil froze mid-step, eyes filling with tears almost involuntarily as he glanced over at Roman. He was curled up on the couch next to the others, his expression kind and soft and Virgil wanted to cry but he felt like he wasn’t allowed to.

“What?”

Roman rose up from the couch, making his way around the coffee table to stand in front of him. “Come nap with us, sweetheart. We want you here, exactly as you are.”

Suddenly, Virgil didn’t seem to have much of a choice on whether he was going to cry or not.

He felt his legs give out beneath him as he fell to the ground, Roman barely managing to surge forward and catch him before he crumpled into a sobbing heap on the floor. He gripped tightly at his boyfriend, tugging him in as close as he could possibly get, face pressed into Roman’s shoulder and wetting his shirt with his tears.

There was heat against his back and sides—Logan and Patton having stumbled their way off the couch to comfort him—a hand in his hair, one rubbing against his back, kisses against his skin. It was overwhelming but it was so perfect. Every action was filled with so much warmth and affection and Virgil never wanted it to end, wanted to stay pressed between his boyfriends’ bodies and drowning in their love for as long as he continued to live.

It simultaneously felt like eons and only a few seconds before they all drew back, prompting an embarrassing whine to leave Virgil’s mouth without his permission. Patton shushed him, giving quick kisses to the now near-dried tear tracks on his face.

“It’s alright, we’re just going to move, love,” Virgil heard Logan whisper from behind him, pressing a soft kiss to the back of his neck that made Virgil shiver.

Patton grasped his hands, pulling him up and over to a mountain of pillows and blankets Virgil was almost certain hadn’t been there before, as the other two trailed after them. Virgil smiled as Patton pulled the two of them down into the pile, wrapping him up tightly in his arms and giving a sort of satisfied hum.

“No fair! I wanted to cuddle the emo nightmare!”

Virgil glanced up to see Roman standing above the two of them, hands on his hips and pouting. Logan was standing beside him, wearing an expression not too dissimilar from his, “I-can’t-believe-I’m-in-love-with-this-idiot” look, if only a bit softer.

Patton’s arms tightened around Virgil as he pressed a kiss to his cheek, making Virgil blush. “Nope! You had your turn, Ro, he’s mine now.”

“I believe I haven’t had a proper chance to cuddle with Virgil either, Patton,” Logan interjected, a ghost of a smile on his face, “What determined that you should be the one to go first?”

Virgil laughed—the happiness bubbling up inside him begging to be heard and interrupting whatever Patton had been about to reply. “How about you both just come down here and I’ll cuddle all of you, sound good?”

There were certainly no complaints from his boyfriends, Roman throwing himself down onto the pillows on Virgil’s other side, bouncing slightly as he landed and wrapping his arms as much around him as he could with Patton still holding on.

Logan, rather than simply flinging himself onto the others the way Roman had, crawled his way over. He wormed himself into Patton and Virgil’s embrace until he had successfully managed to get Virgil to pull him against his chest, pressing a kiss to the top of his head. Patton looked mildly put out by this intrusion, but was quickly pacified by Logan’s lips against his, firm but loving as he pulled Patton closer towards the two of them.

“Go to sleep now, my dear,” Roman whispered, tangling his fingers into Virgil’s hair. He could feel the arm Roman lay on top of him moving slightly, his fingertips swirling patterns into the skin on Logan’s hip.

The warmth was intense—Virgil could feel contact from his boyfriends on almost every part of his body—but rather than feeling crushing, it felt caring. Each brush of hands against his skin and every word exhaled into the air around them adding to the sensation of love that Virgil just couldn’t shake. 

One by one the movements slowed to a stop, breathing steadying out as each of them lost their grip on consciousness. Virgil was the last to go, relaxing with a sigh as he let his eyes flutter closed. After all, he was safe here, safer than he had ever felt before.

Snuggled between each of his boyfriends, Virgil had never slept so well.


End file.
